Libera me de me ipse!

Just before you get too curious the title is in Latin. You can open up a browser and find out the meaning or patiently read through to find out the answer. As I always tell “Thy choice is for Thy”

The trajectory of human development never ceases to amaze. But what is amazement anyways? Nothing but a natural reaction triggered when we see or feel the unexpected, regardless of the nature of the “unexpectedness”.

I don’t indulge in commonly acceptable social behaviours that befit a guy of my age and end up spending a lot of time reading huge chunks of literature that most of the time seem so insignificant to myself, but again there are some things you can’t change isn’t it ?

So this day some random thoughts surged through my mind probably due to an overdose of long reading hours and wiki sessions I was taken aback as I sat there awestruck by the magnitude of the “amazement” that I felt for my own species. Really look at us; from a group of nomadic people we have evolved into the most sophisticated piece of machinery that ever walked on this planet (the choice of “machinery” is intentional). We have proudly proclaimed “The only constant thing is change” and transformed everything on our way to achieve what we want, without ever realising what that “want” is.

“Wants” that is what it is all about! We want more and more regardless of the price that has to be paid. Want itself is a pretty elementary driving force to any living beings and we are no exception, but the thing that I find amazing is that we go after things without even knowing whether we really want them and it gets uglier day by day.

Pretensions are the order of the day. From dusk to dawn life is a theatre being played out there! Be it family, work place, society, all we want is to “belong” and be “accepted”. Do we care to let someone know how bad they are at work or care to tell a friend what you really think about him or just cut off an unbearable egotist? Somewhere down the line we have lost our individuality and we have created and wish to live in a place that is passively true and not driven by truth and righteousness. So when are we our actual own self?

During Birth? Can’t be as we have not yet attained the capacity to think.

During teenage? Can’t be as we are influenced by way too many things.

During the Middle Ages? Can’t be as we bend and play willingly to the fancies of the social setup.

In spite of thinking it over many a times, there is only an infinitesimally small duration in one’s life where “he is just himself”. It’s that painful instance where he finds himself one step away from death. The moment of venturing into the untold and unfelt. Generations and centuries have passed, we have defied predictions and predicaments, but in spite of all the accolades we are still losing the game of righteousness.

The world is in difficult times right now. So who should we save ourselves from? The racists, the sexists, the terrorists, difficult to believe that one species can be driven by so many insane ideologies. Every morning the only prayer I have is “Save me from myself” (which incidentally happens to be the title of the post)

Another Old One !!

I was on a summer trip to one of my friend's house and was returning back by bus. It was a pretty cold night with cool breeze embracing your ears every now and then. I prefer the window seat and was happy that I got one.

For most part of the journey I just couldn't sleep. Its one of those things which you cant see reason and my mind seemed to be in oblivion with lot of random thoughts which made no meaning. I gazed through the window and could see a faint white light running in parallel to the bus. It was the reflection of the small lights within the bus that took the form of a white haze and it was as if it wanted to take me somewhere.

It was kind of an odd feeling as I knew that I was totally conscious and I hadn’t slept but yet I could not help my mind to dwell into realms of uncertainty and into that wonderful thing they call "Dream". So this is what I wrote on that cold windy night:
I know not much, about that day,
When all my dreams were kept at bay,
I show to the world the smiling face,
Hiding all pains without a trace………
Bright faces, I see down street,
Rainbows atop… a visual treat,
Just as my mind was bringing a smile,
My heart did remind the past,
And my tears did embrace my cheek…
Mirror I heard, shows yourself,
I too, did walk up to it,
It showed to me, My Dream, My Life,
Realize did I, a secret fact,
Mind Stops to dream, but not the heart…..

DO ANGELS EXIST?

This is one of my previous posts ....Just thought it wise to have it here as well, as it is one of those precious ones which you never seem to forget !!

Am I an atheist or an antogonist?
Am I a fierce believer in God?I am not quite sure if I can consider myself both. I am pretty radical in my thoughts and habituated myself to challenge any beliefs which do not seem right and at times do not follow them either. However, having been part of a country that is embedded with cultural heritage and having been bought up in an orthodox family I have grown up thinking that there is a superficial force protecting all of us. I am yet to be convinced on either point of views so naturally I am a bit of both.

It was just another Friday evening with all of us planning out our weekends and the usual choices like multiplexes eat joints thrown in. But I got a call from one of my friend telling that she wanted to take me to a place that would be different. The next day I set out on my bike to what was to become a thought provoking experience.
My stop was the “Missionaries of Charity” located near the outskirts of Bangalore or Bengaluru as it is called now a days. It’s a destitute home where old people mainly women who were deserted by their near and dear ones are being taken care by the tender hands of the nuns running this special place. As I slowly started to interact with many of the people here I realized how unfortunate they were or to put it in other words how fortunate we are to be living such a pleasant and carefree life. There were all kinds of people with nowhere to go and only hope and their daily prayers to give them company.
There was this girl who had lost both her hands and legs, can't see properly and can't speak. She was lying on a bed and by her face I could make out she was old however her physical features told otherwise. She was just a old girl in a kids body. With feelings that have no name I wondered. Lot of questions showed itself deep inside my mind... I wondered why God created people like her? He is supposed to be the master how can He bear the sight of his children suffering? I thought that the evolution and subsequent existence of man should be Scientific and the radical part of my mind was taking over.

We were to serve lunch to everyone that day. I took a plate of rice (a traditional South Indian Dish) and fed lunch to the girl in my own hands. A kind of warmth spread over my body, a good feeling, it was that feeling which is pure and too good to be true. For that brief moment I was lost, I think I could say that, lost for words, lost for any desires out of life, lost for any wordly pleasures. I was just thinking about someone else's welfare and the feeling was so warm and good.

As this feeling started to encompass the whole of myself I began to realize that these people were the special kinds; they are the people who help us feel the good within each one of us and to realize the responsibility we have as fellow human beings. It's just doing simple things, they just want to be heard, someone patiently listening to all the little stories they tell.
As it was time to leave the place I saw angels at work, they wore jeans and T-Shirts, they come every Saturday and share their time with these people, bring light to these eyes who have never seen any, sing and dance for them, bringing a smile to their face and are trying their best to make this world a better place to live in. All these angels were young and enthusiastic, people determined to change the world, determined to bring joy of music to ears that have heard the cries of their past, determined to wipe out the wounds that have haunted them for years, angels from different religion bringing their own message of peace in their own little way.
At the end of it all I walked off with a firm belief that Angels are not invisible they do exist right in front of us and I was convinced God exists too, its a matter of who you call God....

Notice not, Do I, the ocean,
It's a sight, I see often.
Horizon is where I want to be seen,
Aware of sharks lying between.
All my fears come to haunt,
But my heart sang, to me my dream.
Almighty took my hand,
My feet led me to destiny.